Appreciate life, appreciate someone’s struggle.

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To my 21st self. Suddenly, I miss you. When did things go wrong? All the enthusiasm about life suddenly fades away. Honestly speaking, I want to go back to you, where everything felt like a dream. Those were the times where you felt like you can achieve everything, that everything make perfect sense. You know what? My goal this past few months is to slowly come back to you, not the childishness that accompanies it, but the enthusiasm and passion in achieving something great, no not great but wonderful. I know those two words are synonymous but I feel like wonderful is more humble than great. Okay, enough with the weirdness!
Sometimes.

Sometimes I felt like fading but I also realized something today. That even though I have personal struggles (who doesn’t, right?) I am still blessed. I just recently discovered that someone I know is battling from chronic kidney disease, actually to be specific it’s already end stage renal disease (ESRD) which means he needs dialysis for the rest of his life or his last option will be to undergo kidney transplant. But of course, the latter is costly and not to mention very risky. It’s sad to know that he is experiencing it right now, like mapapaisip ka talaga minsan na, of all people ba’t siya pa? It’s one of life’s mystery actually, that bad things sometimes happens to good people. He is someone I know who has strong faith to Jehovah but on the brighter side of that, his faith will be even more stronger because I know he will continue to rely all his life to Him. 101%. Not to mention the people whom he will inspire more (including me) because of how much love he has for Jehovah, despite of course of the health issues that accompanies life.

It also saddens me that someone has to be ill so that you will appreciate what life can offer you today. Yes, I am very much guilty with this. Right now, I feel like a very selfish person for feeling these different sorts of emotions, not knowing that someone is in much pain than I am. Physically and emotionally. Actually millions of people are suffering today and I hope the touching hands of Jehovah will reach every soul and heal them. I can somehow feel their pain.

And I know all I can do right now (aside from feeling sorry) is to pray for that person and to just make the most of the time I have here in the world and just make it as wonderful as I imagine it to be. No regrets. Also, making it useful by helping and inspiring other people the best way that I can.


It’s inevitable, all the things that are happening in our lives and will happen in the future but it is also a reminder for us to keep on striving, to keep on living a purposeful life because simply for the reason that someone right now just badly need to live and breathe.

🌱

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Admiring.


Admiring you from afar

Is what I always do best.

You have so much bravery in you

I think it looks good on you.

Our little conversations

Somehow that strong connection

Will never grow old until now.

Your kindness, great sense of humor

Is what makes you stand with the rest.

It makes you 

The most handsome guy 

in the whole universe.

Thank you for our little conversation

Somehow I have a glimpse 

In your day to day living.

I admire you

And forever will be I guess.

Even if it means

I’m not the one for you

And I know that’s for the best.

I’m writing about you 

And I know you will never see this

But at least, in another time

I will remember how you made me feel. 

Random poem for a not-so-random guy.  🌱

Everything heals.

Every cells in our body are design to help us heal, for us to recover from whatever wound or pain we are experiencing right now and will be experiencing in the near future. The white blood cells, one of the most vital composition of blood, are like soldiers who are always on the go when infection or open wound happens. They’re called the first line of defense. Just a little bit of science, lol. Well, I just realized in that little chemistry how important we are to God because he’ll do whatever it takes for us to get away from whatever pain we are experiencing. And I still don’t get it up to now why people still blame God when something bad happens to them. Especially if it’s beyond their control. Nevertheless, it feels good to know that there’s God who’s ready enough to accept our flaws and who will always ready enough to heal us. Everytime. I repeat, everytime and everyday. It’s a secured assurance that he’ll literally catch us everytime we fall. I always love the idea of that. 

What I want to point out is that all of us will experience pain. Every sort of pain. Physically, emotionally, mentally. We’ll go through all that phases of our lives because we are humans, whether we like it or not, each of us will hurt each other (aware or not). As what Bob Marley said, you just got to find the ones worth suffering for.



But the sure thing about pain is that it doesn’t last long. It’s temporary. Temporary for the simple reason that everything heals. Everything will heal and all things takes time. You’re currently hurting right now but it doesn’t mean that it will stay there forever. Yes, maybe, it will leave a mark, a scar that will give you enough reason to give up in love, in life, in everything. But, mind you, if you look life in a different perspective, you will see silverlining in every pain you will experience. It will not just make you strong but when you experienced, feel deeply, appreciate every pain in your heart, you will realise how much you have grown as a person. You become an elastic band, you develop resilience towards life. You have that new found understanding about life that not all things you’ve planned goes along your way. And you have to be more patient and forgiving about it, to yourself and others because that’s the only thing you can learn about life. 

Let me share to you one of my favourite line from my favourite movie A Walk to Remember, “without suffering there will be no compassion”. Suffering is expected, a part of being a human being, but what you get from suffering, ‘compassion’ is something incredible. You developed compassion towards other people because you feel the pain they’re experiencing (because it already happened to you). It grows in you and comes naturally to you. 

So I repeat, whatever pain you’re experiencing right now, always remember that everything heals. And always carry with you the lesson you learned from that, and that will make your life from ordinary to naturally extraordinary because you choose your life. You choose to let pain change you, for the better. 🌿

P.S.: While writing this, I’m not currently hurting inside. It’s just that the idea just pop in my mind and I feel the urge to write this. 

Everyone has ‘baggage’

Growing old, understanding human nature and behaviours. I’ve come to the realization that everyone experienced this. Come to think of it, everyday we are figuring ourselves, we are losing ourselves sometimes because as we all know, life is pretty much not perfect. We will experienced failures, disappointments, discouragement that we start to develop these different sort of ‘baggage’. Life is indeed a ‘Great, Extraordinary Unknown.’

Baggage.

It will not always be the same but everyone has that. Every person became who they are right now because of the things they’ve experienced before and I think it is one of the greatest wonders of being human. You can’t really grasp the intentions and what’s inside the heart and mind that’s why sometimes a person judge another person base on how he/she perceive him/her.

And the good thing there is, we can always be kind, we can always be gentle with people. There are those who really are strong in nature that we thought, this person is really tough, but deep inside we didn’t know that he/she is already hurting. We didn’t know what the person is going through. Someone is suffering from depression, we may not know it. Someone had just lost a loved one, we may not know it. Someone experienced their first heartbreak, we may not know it. Someone may think they’ve been taken for granted and feel unloved, we may not know it.

So it’s not that hard to show kindness to people because everybody deserves to be treated the way they would feel loved. The way they should really be treated. When we realized that each one of us has ‘baggage’ and assume that all of us grows in different ways, in that little way, we put something beautiful in the world. Not only we make someone feel better, we also help ourselves to be more compassionate, more loving and the byproduct? We ourselves become the better person.

And then we grow. Then we are able to face difficult and unpredictable storms in life. We become resilient. We beautify the world.

Isn’t it beautiful? Kindness and understanding goes a long way. So never underestimate it. 🙂

My Nostalgic Playlist

So basically, this post is all about my favorite songs. Currently. I don’t know but being a musically inclined individual, I find it hard to answer when someone ask me my favorite song, maybe because I have so many favorite songs that I can’t think of just one.

But let me just state here how much of a music enthusiast I am. Of how much I appreciate it.

I don’t where it all started but I know as a child I appreciate music as much as I appreciate it now.  From the really cheesy and corny ‘Remember Me by Renz Berano’ my mother used to play over a cassette player, which came from my father who work overseas at that time. I somehow remembered the lyrics and it does make sense now that I still remember it and forever will be I guess.

And there’s Bread. It’s literally a food for the soul because of it’s simple but nostalgic melody. I so love the classic intro guitar of every Bread’s masterpiece. Remembering how everyday my father used to play it makes me want to invent time machine (I know it’s everyone’s dream to have one and impossible to have) just so I can go back to that simple but happiest time. Diary. Guitar Man. If. Make it With You. Everything I Own (this is my personal and all time favorite of all Bread’s songs) And all these songs are perfect for long drives.

And there’s also The Carpenters. A personal favorite of my mother. Sometimes we just sang it to the top of our lungs and I just love those random moments. Top of the World (Mama’s favorite, lol). You (favvvvv). Won’t Last a Day Without You. I just remembered how much we mimicked Karen Carpenter’s unique voice and ending up laughing because of how hilarious it sounds. I miss those moments, they’re so simple and random which makes it all special and worth remembering.

And there’s Air Supply. The Beatles! Michael Jackson. David Pomeranz. To boybands, Backstreetboys, MLTR, Boyzone, A1, M2M, Moffats, Westlife.

And my love for OPM. MYMP. Eraserheads. Rivermaya. Callalily. Hale.

And of course my love for Modern Nostalgic Princes (yup, I made that name up) Ed Sheeran, Passenger, John Mayer and Coldplay. I think I don’t need to explain how much I love them because there music explains it all. And I already said how much I adore Coldplay from my old post (who cares right? Lol okay I write too much)

You see I love songs that makes me feel nostalgic, makes me think of something positive, makes me genuinely happy, makes me feel relax. And sometimes it may be weird or it may be sad but for me it’s all worth the while *rhyming*. That last sentence doesn’t make sense I know. But seriously, you can’t see in my list of songs below that of Selena or Drake or Justin Bieber or Chainsmokers because frankly speaking they lack sincerity and genuineness in lyrics, add to the point that they’re upbeat and really pop. My choice of songs are mainly for me to inspire and to love life more. So here it is. I know no one cares if I like these type of songs but I’m just in the mood to share these quite familiar but more of not familiar kind of songs (I hope I make sense again)

Here’s my current nostalgic playlist:

  • Bear’s Den – Above the Clouds of Pompeii
  • Dido – Quiet Times
  • Philip Larue – I’ll Be Your Home
  • Coldplay – Everglow
  • Coldplay – A Message
  • Coldplay – Sparks
  • Coldplay – Miracles
  • Isaiah – It’s Gotta Be You
  • Josh Ritter – Come and Find Me
  • John Mayer – Free Fallin’
  • John Mayer – You’re Gonna Live Forever in Me
  • Ed Sheeran – Tenerife Sea
  • Ed Sheeran – Supermarket Flowers
  • Lasse Lindh – Hush
  • Jason Mraz – Beautiful Mess
  • Passenger – Beautiful Birds
  • Tracy Chapman – Fast Car
  • Keane – Somewhere Only We Know